patrick-stump-hand: pizzaswag: abandoned theme parks look rad as fuck someone go explore one with me you are the first five minutes of supernatural
assiest: why do people have to get ready for bed? i’m always ready for bed
largebeard: foodchewer: *hides good snacks from family members*
meladoodle: coolgirlfriend: boys who can pull off facial hair are hot i think you’re supposed to use a razor
me in other people's showers: what the fuck is going on
petparent: poopflow: do you ever feel like a plastic bag No, I always feel like a Prada bag
unfollower: no see lesbians are not more accepted than gay men they’re more sexualized please do not get those 2 things confused
heir-of-breasts: half of star trek the animated series is kirk’s face being too close on the screen when he doesn’t need to be in the shot
starllex: A haiku: Hey yo Ice Cream man! Holy fucking shit wait up!!!! Wow okay fuck you.
mom: are you on drugs?
flash 9 is required to suck my dick
chrssy: riding your man like
vagisodium: one time me and my friends were really high waiting at a stop sign and after like ten minutes he turns to me and he’s like “this is the longest stop sign ever”
What if I walked up to Robert Pattinson when he...
dobbyfredsirius: drkarayua: silent-renegade: I strongly believe that man would actually start crying Didn’t you hear about that time he was being swamped by twihards for autographs screaming EDWARD EDWARD and he ignored the fuck out of all of them. But then someone yells CEDRIC and that person is the only one who left with an autograph that day. and only one fuck was given that day
while watching animated movies at age 2: hell yeah motherfucker
while watching animated movies at age 12: hell yeah motherfucker
while watching animated movies at age 20: hell yeah motherfucker
while watching animated movies at age 200: hell yeah motherfucker
i pretend i dont care but deep down i really still dont care
internetexplorers: we could be married with like 4 kids and i’d still be too scared to text you first
tempoes: everyone says “just get out and leave everything behind in the event of a house fire” like no fuck that shit im grabbing every electronic i can hold
iwilleatyourenglish: iwilleatyourenglish: once my baby was being really annoying so i put it in the basement but then i forgot and decided i didn’t want my basement anymore so i got rid of the door and then decided to do the rest later and when child protective services came they couldn’t get to my kid so they just wandered around my house i’m talking about the sims please don’t call the...
WAIT ONE FUCKING SECOND
lifeofamarriedfangirl: reichenfalse: tardis-housecleaner: YOU’RE TELLING ME THAT THERE ARE ONLY SIX EPISODES OF SHERLOCK? ALL THOSE PSYCHO NUT FANS GOT OFF ON ONLY SIX EPISODES!? that’s why our fandom is so fucking weird.
Me: * sees book store * *looks to friend* *shuffles towards bookstore*
nowgiveusakiss-a: I like how they let Loki wear his colour in prison like you murdered dozens of people and try to destroy earth but that green looks great on you man give him a jumpsuit in that shade
ejacutastic: when guys talk about how gross periods are i just laugh because guys have a floppy piece of flesh that gets hard and that’s pretty fuckin weird, bucko